Emotions

I feel like pretty much everyone around thinks that emotions are taking me over. These past few days I have heard words like...emotionaly dependant, needy, emotionally overwhelmed. They look and think of me as a weak, oppressed little girl.

This all makes me sick!

I am not weak. There isn't anything worng with my emotions. For goodness sake it is ok to be emotional, thats why we have emotions. And please don't pick the time that my hormones are playing a number on me, to bring up different psychosis. If these people only knew exactly how strong I am, they would think twice about saying things like that. No, I don't have everything figured out, and at times I am really gullable, thats not abnormal.

I think the problem is, very few people see all of me. They see the part that relates to them, or only the parts they accept and want to get to know. In turn it makes me aprehensive to showing all of me, knowing they won't understand. My thoughts and views on things aren't always simple...they are always simply complicated. But I'm tired of excusing myself for being me. I'm tired of holding back parts of me, so that no one gets offended. I'm tired of wondering if I fit other people's image of me. And for a change they will have to deal with me, not me deal with their reaction to me. They will just have to see, the rare and unique woman that I am. They think I'm trying to be like Tricci, that I'm conforming to what I think T likes or not, that I'm trying to be the perfect everything, I'm not... please....please stop thinking that. And I think Everyone will like who I really am, a whole lot more than who they see now. Its hard to explain on the blog, because here I can say exactly what I think. So if you only know me in the blog world, this isn't a rant towards you. Ironically its to those that don't read this blog.

I agree that my realtionship with Tricci is well, not balanced as much as it should be. And it might be time that we part ways, who knows right now. It might be that we should just be friends and not so close. That will play out in time, I'm not worried about it.

I leave you this to ponder. If you think my emotions overwhelm me, and you think at times I'm more than dramactic....why does it pile up? Would it be that way if you allowed me to share myself openly?