Matrix Love

Since it snowed and sleeted all weekend here, the family and I decided to watch all 3 Matrix movies as a marathon Saturday night. I had seen the first two but never the third one. I have heard several people say that this trilogy was based off of the life of Jesus. I don't know if I would say the life of Jesus, but it definitely has the whole savior complex. But you know me...I have to look at and talk about what was apparent to me.

The characters Neo and Trinity; Niobi and Morpheus; Z and Link and even the architect and the Oracle.....all share a unique love. Lets look at each of them shall we?

First and I think one of the easiest to talk about...The architect and the Oracle...
They were on either side of the "Machine side" The Oracle wanting peace and the architect wanting just to win...To balance the equation. Yet they both are portrayed as the Mother and Father of the Matrix...Somehow to me...That translates into a love. You see I don't think that all love is mushy and easy. To me, the love they shared was difficult but neither one could bare to see the other destroyed. I suppose some would see that as mutual respect not a kind of love...But hey they aren't ME. Just the way they were around each other...They knew the other's weakness but didn't use it to destroy them.

Then there is Morpheus and Niobi....The love they shared wasn't easy either...It seems they both had to go and "sample" other things. They even had an anger between them...Yet they were there for each other when they needed it and could not deny that they needed each other. That no matter how hard they tried they cared what happened to the other. One thing they had to let go of, was the hurt between them. They had to learn how to truly trust each other.

Then there is Z and Link...Who argue because of the care and concern for the other one. They didn't always understand that that is what they were doing...But they stood in each other's corner. Z as a woman did the hard thing and stayed in the face of danger if it meant she could see him again. And Link went to face an unknown danger to save the woman he loved. In the end making it back to each other's arms was so worth it.

Then there is Neo and Trinity...Such a "great" man who could do all of these wonderful things, changed many people's lives...Yet he still needed her. She was such a strong woman, who could handle her own, yet still she needed him...In a way to protect her. Their love was so strong that death had a hard time separating them.

Now that being said, I do know that it is just a movie... And what I am about to say may seem far out...But I truly believe it in my heart of hearts...And therefore it is real to me. No I don't believe in the Matrix...And I'm not some Trekkie.

While watching the movie I remembered a conversation T and I had a long long time ago...We were still in highschool...And it was shortly after I told him I loved him. I already knew that he loved me. We were talking after school at a park, we had a little blanket on the side of the hill. We laid there and just talked...

There was something bothering T. I never knew quiet what it was that bothered him, but I knew it had to do with leaving me by death. He asked me would I be able to move on without him? What would happen to me if I was here laying with him dying in my arms. I remember laying on his chest playing with a button and tearing up. The thought of him dying had never ever crossed my mind before. And I know it was silly to say, but I meant it with every fiber in my being...And still mean it. If he were laying in my arms dying, I would not allow him to die...I would cry out to God so that I believe he would send him back to me, heal him whatever it took. That I could and would not see a world without him. I don't think he believed what I said, he wanted to know the for real answer. But that was the only answer I had. After a while I asked him the same question. He told me the same answer.

Also while in school, I had many people try and talk me out of this love with T. A friend once asked me what if he did something horrible...Could you forgive him and stay? Once again, I had the most naive, wrong answer that anyone wanted to hear...But it was the truth of my heart. That he could do anything and I would still be his. Yes, I might be hurt but my love was strong enough to forgive and love him anyways. They all thought me foolish...And said in time I would regret it and be hurt.

And yes, we have hurt each other...But our love is stronger than that and we are still here. Love does not mean you will never get hurt or be angry.

The truth of my heart is not always accepted in society or understood. However that does not make it false. He knows that I would give anything for him. He even once said that I shouldn't feel that way, because everything is a lot. And I know that, but that doesn't make it a lie. He said I was his everything...And most would agree that he shouldn't have said that either...But I know for a fact he does not say things that aren't the truth of his heart either... LOL...Sometimes we may wish they weren't but they are.

So I said all of that to say this...Yes I do believe that there is a love that strong out there....T and I share it. We don't let go and we won't. There are a many that won't understand...And that is ok...They don't have to.